REALLY EFFING ROYAL - PRINCE HARRY 1 OF 2

(REALLY EFFING ROYAL is an amazing new iam___ feature where we investigate the Royal Family. We really want our 'brothers from another mothers' overseas to understand wtf is up with the Royal Family. Let's begin, hmmm?)

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Sup, nigs?
Today we investigate Prince Harry.

Feel like there's a lot of BS about 'The Ginger Nut' circling the internets / old media. 
Really just want to get to the bottom of it all and learn about the REAL P. Harry.

I do not understand what P. Harry's situation is /:-/ confused-face. 
I think that it might be time to get my 'big boy pants' on, 'knuckle down,' and do some serious investigative journalism.
In part 1, we investigate popular opinion of P. Happy:


POSITIVE POPULAR OPINION :-) HAPPYFACE:

• He is the Cool One from the Royal Family.
• He is sooo into socialising / party times / getting 'completely fucked up.'
• Flies the helicopter.
• Does work for charity.
• Seems pretty legit. Like you could 'have a pint' or 'cum' with him.

NEGATIVE POPULAR OPINION :-( SADFACE:

• Bit racist.
• Bit of a sillybilly.
• Slacker / general underachiever. 
• Doesn't 'fly the helicopter' or actually 'do shit' in the army / life. 
• Not as solid a meme as Princess Diana (mumsy).

Don't know wtf the truth is :-? confused-face.

I'm going to explore the internet to confirm or deny the ^^^ above situations. 

We might learn something, but probably not.

Wish me luck, niggas!

<3 heart symbol.

Q&A
If you could be king for a day would you be:
a) Pretty Chill - Helping people and being a goody2shoes?
b) Okay - Probs spend all day keeping it zzz casual. Might have a nap?
c) Not Okay - Steal things from the palace and then blame it on the staff?
d) Asshole - Sexually harass the secretary and then be all like, "Sup?"
e) Tyrant - 'Murder' someone just to feel alive. Sell noods of K. Middy to the Old Media. Sell stuff from the palace to buy drugs (marijuana cigarette, coke, smack, wizz, doping a bong). Order up some food from the kitchen and then send it back down for some 'fucking bullshit' reason. Blow all of your / the countries money on redonkulous hobbies like Bonsai Trees or Pokeman Collectible Card Game?

Don't just pick an answer at random. Remember, your choice will have very serious ramifications for the inhabitants of your kingdom.
Think really long and hard before choosing :-O amazed-face.

xx (2 kisses.)

IN TODAY'S MODERN WORLD CAN ANYONE LISTEN TO 'PURPLE RAIN' BY PRINCE (AND NOT THINK OF SOME BS TALENT CONTEST CONTESTANT)?

Sup, niggas?
(This question is rhetorical.)
Been listening to a lot of Prince atm.

(I'm not really sure if he's currently going by the name 'Prince' or 'The Artist Formally Known As Prince' or 'TAFKAP' or ':-) Symbol Thing.' Prince, if you're reading, please explain your situation, tnx.)

When the hit single Purple Rain plays - I don't even think of it as a Prince MP3 anymore. Years and years of dodgy talent show contestants have 'totally effing ruined' the song for me >:-( angryface.

When I think about some Purple Rain, I think of the following: 

• Warbling. (Maybe with the eyes closed and with the wobbly hand.)
• Stoopid edgy remix. Probs with some beat boxing. Ugh.
• Stoopid carbon copy.
• Dated stage show. (Dry ice / child choir with candles / miscellaneous coloured choir / unemployed drama postgrad dancers / jazz hands / projector screen playing B&W love situation / gay man on motorcycle / those rope tumbler-niggas pouring down from the ceiling / plastic flowers / exciting lasers.) 
• Emotional sob story.

That's what I think when I think Purple Rain ^^^ but what do YOU effing think when YOU think Purple Rain?

Slowly starting to really resent these plucky chancers playing sillybuggers with classic songs.

I think that it might be time to metaphorically draw the line.
I think that we might have to kill again, my nigs.
Unfortunately, it might be time to 'murder' someone :-( sadface.

iam___ might 'draft up' a list of artists / classic songs, which these unself-aware talent show animals can no longer dick around with.

Off the top of my head:

Jeff Buckley.

Queens.

Stephen Wonder.

Wham!

(That's just for starters. Let me know if I've missed anyone.)

Might investigate talent show contestant sob stories tmw.

xxxo (3 kisses & 1 hug.)

BLT - BEAR, LION, TIGER.

Hey, niggas. As you're well aware I spend the majority of my time OTI. I use this time becoming more self-aware, illegally downloading content, cyberbullying strangers, social networking, and learning about this incredible effing world that we live in. 
Obvs, most of it's pretty anitlol: 

• The War on Terror.
• Galactic Economic Meltdown.
• Pollution.
• Copywrite Trolls dicking around with torrent sites :-( sadface.
• Terrorism.

Man, sometimes just want to get away from it all and live a life of gentle reflection in a miscellaneous Asian country.

Anyways, recently I 'came' across a situation which made me :-) happyface.

This story is brought to us by the abc. From what I understand, they're a bit like the BBC but for our friends 'across the pond.' (I'm sure I heard somewhere that they're a 'little bit fishy' and sometimes make up the news - a little bit like the Fox News. 
Various Cool Kids across the internets / life seem to bash the Fox News.
Not really sure why. 
Defo need to become more involved with 'world issues.')

"All of my life,
I have wanted to trust / believe the news.
I just really want to learn,
about Palestine." - Haiku promoting truth © 2013

Basically, the video / story clearly shows a bear, a lion, and a tiger who have transcended traditional values of 'murdering' one another and embraced friendship - becoming true niggas. 
Sort of feel like this story can teach us all something.

If the bear, the lion, and the tiger can learn to live in perfect harmony - why can't we?
Don't want to grow up hating my neighbor.
Don't want to shock and awe brown people and miscellaneous coloureds. 
Want to 'judge someone based upon their own merits' and NOT by racial stereotypes.
Want to love my neighbor. (Unless they're overweight / ugly / dog person, obvs.)

Do you think that ^^^ cry for peace and understanding is powerful enough to change the world?
Should I change my Facebawks status until there is serious and sustainable change in the modern world?

"Man was born with 2 hands.
1 to help himself.
1 to help others." - Ancient Haiku by some peace and love kind of nig

Q&A
I'm sure we can all agree that 'Man was born with 2 hands,' but should 1 really be used for peace?
Can / should 'Man' use both hands to kill other 'Man' more efficiently? 
Are you in the Armed Forces?
Major motion pictures, like Jarheads, Born on the 4th of July, You Can't Handle the Truth, and We Were Soldiers need less BS and more explosions. Do you agree?
Obvs, it'd be aces to live in peace - but wtf do we do about the 'Polish Problem?'

Don't think I'm qualified / self-aware enough to resolve these issues :-( sadface.

Gtg. 
(Going to do a charity bake sale outside my house to raise money for bear / lion / tiger aka BLT.)
Does anyone know how to make cupcakes? 
(:-? confused-face.)